hatstuck snarl

theoretically, a hairstyling salon


COSMO (C Ow Steve/Monica Operate) Quiz:

1. When assembling a paper shredder do you:

a. See how quickly you can jamb it? (Just how much is too much?)
b. Read the directions
c. Read the directions after the product is fully assembled (Who needs directions for that spare part?)

2. When eating messy vegetarian food, do you:

a. Use four napkins?
b. Wipe your upper lip with a napkin and the vigor you have when running a bathtowel across your wet back after a shower?
c. Use your pants.

3. When walking down the street (in tandem) do street people:

a. Stare at a prime body part of yours and ask for spare change.
b. Block your path.
c. Express their joy and satisfaction that you don’t appear to be angry at yourself?

4. When you reassemble a lamp post for a surprised goth on a cell phone, does she:

a. Stare at you like you may have been trying to scratch her
sacred boot when actually you were bending down to replace the metal she dislodged?
b. Continue talking on her cell phone and stare?
c. Stop talking on her cell phone and stare?

5. When you discuss speed racing (via bicycles), can you:

a. Accurately define the word “attacking”?
b. Name three top contestants in a current race?
c. Say, yeah, I go really fast on my bike.

Extra Credit: Today at lunch, who ordered falafel, and who wanted a veggie burger?

Tally Yo' Score! If you answered:

1. Tally Yo' Score:
a: 8 points - Steve and Monica like to see how much is too much, and they enjoy the sound of corporate stuff eating itself.
b: 0 points – Why invent the wheel when you can reinvent? (And waste company time using your creative thinking skills?
c: 7 points – Pretty good answer. We like to see what’s actually needed.

2. Tally Yo' Score:
a: 4 points – This isn’t the most exciting tidbit, but Monica did indeed use four napkins at lunch today.
b: 12 points– You’ve got class and style (like Steve).
c: deduct 10 points - (Monica never wears skirts! Trick answer.)

3. Tally Yo' Score:
a: 1 point – If your body is prime, you’ve at least got that going.
b: 0 points: Are you that pansy that you allow street people to maim and terrify you on your lunch break?
c: 13 points – Wow, you must really follow the path assigned for you!

4. Tally Yo' Score:
a: 3 points – You tricked a goth girl! Good work!
b: 2 points – Well, this did happen to us too, so we can’t think you’re uncool if it turns out like that for you too.
c: 4 points – You must have really influenced her aura.

5. Tally Yo' Score:
a: 38 points – You’re good with language and you know what’s going on in different (or at least in one) subculture(s).
b: 28 points – You must be tech-savvy to follow such races, and you’re paying attention. Good work.
c: deduct 12 points - You have exceeded us both; we do not like or appreciate that.


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